Why should we forgive ourselves or others for hurting other people or animals? Why should a man who beats his wife forgive himself? To figure out if it is possible or even worth it, let’s examine these questions. Hurting another person, human or otherwise, is never the first step. Perhaps it is more of the result of skipping steps in the learning process we call Life.
When a babies leave their mothers’ womb and take their first breath they may not even be aware of and certainly can barely control their own bodies. At first we communicate by simply crying, laughing or making sounds in general, then we point at things or persons. We take our first baby steps and our consciousness slowly discovers a larger area around us: the one who gave birth to us, then other persons living with us, and most of the time we call those immediately around us “family”.
As we become more mobile we discover other persons, families and so on around us. Usually then we learn to identify with ideas such as nations or countries then the human “race”. Some of us stop here and while their consciousness is capable of expanding further to envelop the rest of the world they stop, at least for a while, from discovering more of the universe (cosmos if you will).
Wherever you stop on this neverending discovery of the world will determine how far you can go in loving, forgiving and accepting and you may or may not become able to love yourself unconditionally. Not even others, but yourself at first and foremost. It is not to say forget about others, but to love yourself first to enable in yourself the unconditional love and acceptance, regardless of your (insert your negative ideas about yourself).
You set your heart right first, enable or unleash or tap into the love in you and around you. Once you let go of the idea that you are better (or worse) than others and have a “moral high ground”, that you have the right to judge them, that you are an authority for whatever reason, you begin to see the reasons for your and other people’s actions. You will understand that people act a certain way because of how they see the world and because that is the only way they can imagine and accept. You will understand you judge them, because that is how you were trained and taught.
We must start to respect ourselves first, regardless of “fault” we may discover in ourselves. We must accept ourselves truly and deeply and forgive ourselves first. That is a truly liberating feeling and from that unburdened state we can embrace others. Yes we can embrace others and we must! Not only in a hug the heart centers meet, but we are showing our vulnerability to each others after we accepted ourselves, knowing that whatever “fault” we perceive the other person to have is just as unimportant as our own “faults”.
Do you understand why a person who is hurting others must forgive themselves first? If we understand the pain through ourselves and we understand we are all connected to one another we certainly do not want to hurt ourselves and, through ourselves, others.
That said, should we look out for people who cross the street without looking with their earbuds in, listening to music?