I had enough of a lot of things!!!
I had enough of people who kick and thread on others then believe it is enough to burp out an “apology” to make it right. They believe that the “sorry band aid” will cover the deepest wounds they inflict, with their razor sharp tongues and ill intentions. The wounds which so precisely severed the arteries of the others, by founding the gaps between the plates of the armour of others, covering their weakness, doubts and pain. How could one believe that by aiming for a soft spot and meaning the worst for the other they could get away from that battle actually stronger, not just feeling a false taste of a fleeting “victory”???
I had enough of people pretending to know nothing to manipulate others. I had enough of not regarding the other to say “please”, instead of “can you?” or “it would be great if”. What makes them believe they can manipulate others to act and bend to their will when they can’t even utter a single honest request for help? What makes them believe they are entitled to be helped by others, even when their attitude is lazy, ignorant and self-centered. When the requester does not even show the slightest humility and respect, even when they are in need of assistance from others???
I had enough of the cyber-infants, who believe they are cool when they are merely using and consuming low level technology, such as a mobile telephone, but can’t even figure out how to find or read a User Manual. I had enough of people masturbating their fruit labelled phones, but can’t realise that the white wires hanging out of their ear look like dried pleasure secretion, while their asses and consciousness are being raped by the unethical companies that produce those devices.
I had a glimpse of why Robin Williams, Philip Seymour Hoffman and countless other sensitive, gentle and beautiful humans could not bear the weight of their existence. When a cancer causing device, that supposed to connect us, separates us and stops us from being up close and personal with each other. It is not OK to only look at the world through a screen or a lens all the time. You need to see what is happening, you must give it your full attention, you ought to take it in with all your being, with eyes and heart. But only if you care enough. I hope you do.
I hope we can care about how cold the streets can be. So cold that it steals the body heat of homeless people. I hope we can remember that next time, when a dirty outstretched arm reaches towards us and a beaten, humiliated voice of a human asks for a some spare change. That change, a few coins, is only band aid over cancer which has its root deep inside the society we created. Where things only happen if they get mentioned between toothpaste and mortgage advertisements. When we are so bored that we watch, but we do not see.
You wish for a cure, a prescription pill, that would make this all go away. But all you find is daily struggle with addiction. We are all addicts. We believe, ignore and lie. We all wish to “wake-up”, “ascend” and be “reborn”. We all believe love will conquer all, but this formula is faulty. Love is not enough, without the will to act.
When you want to change, you feel the “withdrawal symptoms” of your old ways. The gravity of a black hole, the mighty force of habits, which feel like a well worn shoe you love to wear. But you must never ask yourself why you are sticking to bad habits. That would be like asking a smoker why they smoke or a junk food addict why they eat what makes them sick, as it would make them come up with justification for their current behaviour, hence reinforce it. Instead you must remind yourself, reason with yourself why do you want to change. It will make you come up with good reasons for the change. This way you will help yourself, because no one else can…